Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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