i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
