Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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