Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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