im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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