She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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