haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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