If that was your dad, he is hot
Me. At least after what I've been through.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize