So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
