D3 body, D1 cock
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
