sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
