This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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