How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I cut my penus on the lid.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
