no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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