My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
