im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I touched a dick in church today
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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