You work out of a Hotel?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I'm too high and old for this...
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
