Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
