I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
