Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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