I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
