i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
party gras won. party gras always wins.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
