he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
people are starting to question the shark bite story
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
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