Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
we made out on top of his cat.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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