What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
