drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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