Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
