I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
jump out the window naked night went bad
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