I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
