So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
