end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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