So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
