I accidentally burped into my bong.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
