I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
