I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize