the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
