You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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