Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
