Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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