sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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