I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
