he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
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