tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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