Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
He kissed a someone with a penis
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
