btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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