I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Did I show you my penis last night?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Randomize
