You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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