from now on my penis is your penis
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
