whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
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