Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Randomize
