I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
